*Really Got no Idea what u want*

Sigh!! what the hell is going on with u ERIN? come on wake up. Slap yourself. Fuck man!!! Mother fucker... Yesterday was Xmas day. I was online in the noon and "he" was online too. So we chatted. He seems to feel bored caused he kept saying "SIAN". I then asked him "never go out meh" He said got no money. I was like oh oh. The reason was caused he had spent alot of on cab to couple of places as his friends just came back from china and got no sg cash. In my mind i was wondering "Ha..so smart said no sg cash! brillant idea ah" This reminds me how a china woman cheated my brother. Fuck off man..He then said he wanna come over. I was like ok come lo caused i wanna know what he really wants. Well he returned me the things which he bought for me last time. I was like ok. As usual, nothing much when he was over at my place. I was uploading pics into my blog at that time and he was resting beside me. In my mind i was thinking, is my house a hotel? He wanna come he come, he wanna care he care. What the fuck!! Even though i wanna wish to go geylang to work but i dont have the standard. Well if i wanna be "chick" i will find a rich one. Kind of a little pissed off when he told me that he loves my company but till the end of the day he still dont know what he wants. I was like ok why are u taking my footsteps. In the past, its me who is hanging there cause i dont know what i want and i made him hanging in the middle too. Now its my turn to be hanging up in the air. He said he dont wanna be unfair to me. I was like ok then, lets play the game. Since dragged so long le continue dragging lo. On xmas eve night, he still went over to his friends place. He and a girl play throwing "soft toy" with one another somemore. FUN RIGHT. EXCITING MAN. Ha!! i knew about all these caused i heard the conversation when he was over at my place. He even told me that is one of the "china dolls". I said i know ah. Caused i heard the typical china accent what. He said Im jealous i then said i dont have the time to be JEALOUS. What for man. Right now he got no cash and still he wanna go out and even borrowed 20 bucks from his mum. Late at night i smsed him. Guess what he is still outside. I then said with china dolls right. He said ya. He even said its raining outside thats why cant go home. I was like better still then dont go home lo. I asked enjoyed right!! He said so so la. I then added, u seems enjoying ne rather than so so wor. Well after this there isnt any reply from him. On my brother side, he quarrelled with his gf. Well i knew that he still loves his ex alot since long ago. Well i know that he is lonely over that and needed some company. Well now he thinks that have sex and no love whats the point. I then added. U guys only want sex what. No sex will die. He said now no sex nevermind but in future cannot. I was like thats different. I asked him the same question alot of time "do you really love her" He said not really sure. I was a little pissed. Hai. I only talk to the girl once. Well who to side, i really got no idea. caused the girl seems to over controlled my brother lifestyle too. Well one is my brother who is also a "MAN" too, on the other hand is a woman who is at a lost. Well i got no idea too as my brother feel like breaking up with her and he wanted me to give him some suggestions. I was like now i really dont know what is true love. cause mine is SUCKS too. Well both bro and sis love life SUCKS together. "Birds of the same kind flock together man. Single is the best, NO worries, no thoughts thus lead to lesser brain cells being killed for no reason. RIGHT NOW, i only know what is money. Nothing but money and Family which are important to me. Argh!!! Time to wake up and listen!! argh..."Nobody wants me, anybody out there wants to take me?" Come COme man. Got a call from Alex yesterday. I was like where have u been man, Ha at least i know that he is still the same as usual. He asked me how am i? I was like still the same jumping around. Even added and asked who spent with me on Xmas eve, I was like fren la. He said who who? which one. I was like A MAN la ok. He said why dont i settled down and stop playing around. I said i am what but i Kana ditched my a bastard what. He then laughed. He said im always playing around. Well, Im always playing around meh?? FUCK..